As a parent what do you choose to reflect?

April 5th, 2012

Every moment in connection with another is a moment where we can choose to uplift or negate another’s experience. Think about this for a minute. Each encounter with a child, partner, friend, community member, and even moments by yourself, are moments when you are given a choice. You can understand, validate, hear, honor, regard, witness, listen, or you can disregard, threaten, punish, negate, challenge, shame or diminish (of course there are many more choices too).

Yes, life is stressful and at times our tempers are short, we don’t have the desire to hear things, we are super busy and frankly just want things to be taken care of without having to ask another 100 times. Oh how human we are!

Here’s a valuable insight to help you navigate these moments- you are reflecting to others what is inside of you. You may ask your partner to listen, beg your child to do what you’ve asked, felt frustrated that you are not heard or respected, and at the core the question to ask yourself is are you respecting, listening to and honoring yourself?

We cannot ask others to give to us, what we do not give to ourselves. Now before your mind jumps ahead to reasons why this is not possible, or if you catch yourself moving into critical, blaming or shaming thoughts, take a deep breath-EXHALE.

How can you choose to honor, respect, listen to, validate yourself? In every moment when you desire to be critical or negative towards yourself or others, pause and exhale. Ask yourself what you choose to reflect.

CQ Playful Creative Activity:

Take out a piece of paper, collage materials, markers, pastels, or paint. Find a quiet place to work. Take a deep breath, and ask yourself, what is it that I need to hear right now? Allow yourself the space to explore with the art materials. Hold whatever you create with loving kindness and allow any judgments or negative thoughts to be released.

When you take the time to honor and witness your thoughts and feelings (both good and bad) you’ll likely feel re-energized, nourished, and ready to reflect your inner calm to those around you.

Want lots more empowering creative tools? Join our NEW Supportive, Non-Judgmental & Downright Awesome Community of Parents & Professionals committed to lovingly transforming the lives of children across the globe.

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